Runninng from the past
by Hypatia Cade
Summary: Draco/Hermione----"My stomach heaved again at the thought of facing Ron’s family. I should have saved him. Wasn’t that my unspoken duty? He was defenseless and I was free to help him and instead I froze. And then Harry…Oh God..." And so she runs...


**Authors Note:**** This story is a product of a weekend hanging out with my brothers watching ultimate fighting, or ultimate wrestling as I call it in order to piss them off. Hmmmm... I know your not really going to understand that where that comes into play, but it will become obvious in later chapters. Have fun reading. I like this story a lot, so far, and I hope that you feel the same. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Or Draco Malfoy for that matter, although I would like to borrow him for a couple of hours. Te he. **

-Preface-

I inched closer to Ron as we made our way through the woods behind Harry, in order to keep our bodies from slipping from beneath the cloak. My hand was stiffly but tightly coiled around my wand at my side. Somewhere ahead of us Voldemort was awaiting our attack. Harry was tracing Voldemort through their mind connection. Behind us the battle raged all over the grounds of Hogwarts. Before we had made it into the Forbidden Forest, broken bodies had littered the ground. The bodies of our allies stood out starkly against the black of the Death Eater uniform. I didn't bother to step over the bodies of the enemy after being treated like I didn't deserve to tread upon the same ground as them I saw it only fitting that they became my ground. Somehow I don't think the pureblood elitists will find humor in that piece of irony. I wouldn't say that I was completely insensitive at this point in the war but I would most definitely have to agree that my emotions had become hardened. These were not humans…they were monsters.

Harry turned and signaled that we were close. I strain to make my footsteps, which were already feather light, completely silent. Beside me I hear the snap of a twig and immediately turn to glare at Ron. Although Ron and I have never really gotten along I always find myself being paired off with him. In all parts of life really- when Harry, Ron and me go on missions for the order it's always my job to protect Ron, but also in my personal life. Romantically over the years I've been linked to both Harry and Ron. The Harry rumors were always fleeting while the ones containing me and Ron seemed more of a permanent fixture in my life. My theory being that while people believe that I have to be having passionate sex with one of my best friends, it could not be Harry because I am just too ordinary for someone so extraordinary.

Fifty feet ahead a clearing was barely visible. Harry turns, his wide eyes searching the woods for our presence, and nods slightly. A drop of sweat slides down my back making a visible chill run through my body. Ron completely oblivious gives Harry the thumbs up, literally an invisible show of support. Harry is already walking forward and I shake off my misgivings and loyally follow behind him. As we get closer a figure, who could only be Voldemort from the magic and evil rolling off it in waves, becomes visible in the clearing. Harry reaches the edge and stands behind a tree, steadying his breathing and nerves.

"There is no need to hide boy. Just as you can feel me through our shared link, I can also feel you." The voice, which was a pitch that was inhuman, startled Ron beside me and he jumped away from me and the cloak. Voldemort's eyes flickered in my direction but then focused on Ron. The slash, which I supposed was his mouth, tilted up on the ends in a poor imitation of a smile. "Well, well Potter! Couldn't find the nerve to face me without your trusty sidekick? Come here boy and stand beside your friend. " Ron made his way slowly, using the trees for coverage, to the area near Harry. I stay stock still in hope that Voldemort was unable to deduce my presence. That piece of ignorance could come in handy later.

Harry stepped out of his hiding place, back straight and wand held high. He opened his mouth but before he could answer Ron stepped out from behind his tree. "Harry didn't need to bring anyone! He would willingly take you on alone. He's honorable and fairness is important to him. I made the choice to stand next to him. He is my brother and I would die for him. If we fall, we fall together." I used the noise from Ron's speech to mask my entrance into the clearing. But immediately as the last word left Ron's mouth, Voldemort had his wand drawn and Ron was falling to ground. I tried to make my mind concentrate on the fact that the light from the spell wasn't green so Ron was not dead. I missed the point when the duel started but by the time I came out of my daze spells were flying throughout the clearing.

In midair, their spells connected. The spells flew back towards their casters reentering their wands. The clearing was still and silent for barely a second before power surged forth from both of their wands. I was thrown backwards against a tree at the edge of the clearing. I quickly threw up a shield up around myself before the second power surge hit. It was more powerful than the first. The grass and plants around started to burn from the power and heat of the raw magic that flowed around it. A small sound of pain brought my gaze to Harry. I had seconds to take in the look of agony on his face as his skin melted from the power of the magic. His body was frozen in place with his hand glued to his wand, just to save us all. He would keep his hold in order to destroy Voldemort.

The scream had barely formed in my throat before the third serge of magic blinded me with its intensity. The scream smothered in my throat coming out as a choking gasp instead. My shield threatened to give way. My jaw clenched tight as I drew from the magic at my core and placed additional layers into my shield. As soon as the magic slid tightly into place my shield stabilized and my attention slid to the scene before me. Magic flowed all around the field, burning everything in its path. Harry looked like he was dissolving in face of the magic. A look toward Voldemort confirmed that he was suffering the same fate. Ron was completely unaware as he was dissolved and he mingled with the air. It would have almost have seemed a peaceful death, if the reminder of Harry's face was not stuck at the forefront of my mind. The magic flew upward and dissipated in the breeze above the top of the trees with one last blast of light.

The dark cloud that had been carried by the magic fell. The fog blanketed around me, smothering me, unperturbed by the shield of magic around me. The shield protected me from magic but not from this worse evil. I choked on the dust and gagged reflexively as I realized what was happening. These dust sized particles were pieces of my friends…of Voldemort.

The need for air caused me to breathe in and as the particles caked my mouth and throat, I fell to my knees and spilled the contents of my stomach onto the ground beside me. The reality of what had happened in the past quarter of an hour came crashing down around me, surrounding me, like this 'dust cloud' that was their remains. A loud sound made me jump before I realized that the animalistic cry came from me as yet another agonized sob was ripped from my chest. I had killed my friends. No they didn't die by the end of my wand but I didn't do all that I could to save them. I was motionless for the whole confrontation. I could have shielded Harry. Or I could have gone to Ron and at least shielded both of us. But no, instead my first instinct was to save myself. Selfish. I choked back another sob as I heard a voice yelling in the distance.

My mind reeled. Closer to my left still in the cover of the wood, I heard the voice of Molly Weasley yelling for her son. My stomach heaved again at the thought of facing Ron's family. I should have saved him. Wasn't that my unspoken duty? He was defenseless and I was free to help him and instead I froze. And then Harry…Oh God…How the whole of Britain will despair when they hear of their saviors death. Of course they will see how it could have been prevented. How _I_ could have prevented it.

They were getting closer… I closed my eyes and pictured the small bathroom of a restaurant in New York City, a fleeting memory from a past family vacation, and apparated. As I whirled away from that clearing in the Forbidden Forest, a weight was lifted from my chest, as I gave in to my need to flee from the situation. From the pain.

Chapter 1: New Beginnings

The fates, feeling that they had done enough to me in one night, had mercifully left the bathroom that I apparated into devoid of a human presence. The bathroom was more run down than the last time I saw it. The summer I received my acceptance letter into Hogwarts we went on a trip to New York City to visit my mother's sister.

I only met the women twice but she was nothing like my mother. My mother was all about plans and organization. Aunt Mary loved being spontaneous and any activity that may result in death. She lived for adrenaline rushes created by facing your fears. Every week she would try something new; skydiving, mountain climbing, cliff jumping. Aunt Mary lived very much in the now and didn't care much for planning. Before she died mother always told me that living in New York City was just another way for Aunt Mary to get her adrenaline rush. The chill of fear she must fill throughout the day kept her satisfied enough through the work week that she could bide her time till the weekends, where she could live the dangerous life she craved.

That train of thought slowly moved to a dead end as I caught my reflection in the rectangular mirror that hung above a small water basin. The mirror was covered in a thin layer of dust but that didn't stop it from reflecting my own dust covered appearance. My stomach heaved again and I gagged uselessly. The empty state of my stomach did not stop the bile from rising. I spit it into the sink and then ran some water to rinse my mouth. Without a second glance at the mirror I cast a cleaning charm on myself.

What was I going to do? I left Britain because I watched my friends die from sidelines. I didn't want to have to explain that story to everyone or anyone for that matter. I didn't want to point out to everyone that I, Hermione Granger, am nothing but a coward. Tears ran down my face and sobs started to cause my body to convulse. My back touched the wall and I slid down it listlessly until I was sitting on the floor.

The door to the bathroom opened suddenly causing me to gasp. The intruder's eyes flew to me and were instantly filled with compassion. She was a stunning woman. She had waist length curly black hair and ice blue eyes that vaguely seemed familiar. Her top lip was slightly bigger than her bottom but it only made her face moresensual. Her skin was pale and unblemished. She looked like she should be wearing a ball gown at a royal function instead of the plain jeans and tank top she was in.

"Excuse me?" She inched closer to me and bent down into a crouch. "Are you okay?" I couldn't answer instead I just sobbed harder. She let me cry my fill. When the sobs subsided into sniffles she tried again. "One of those days?"

I nodded in agreement, "Indescribably bad." I reached up beside me to the paper towel dispenser and grabbed one. I wiped my eyes and blew my nose.

"I know just the cure for that." She stood up and held a hand out to help me to my feet. "I happen to be going out tonight and a night out could do you a lot of good. I'm in the city on business and I don't know anyone. Really you would be doing me a favor. Please." The pout on her face would have been humorous on any other day. I thought over her offer for a minute. What else did I have to do? Nothing. Leaving everything you ever knew behind really clears a schedule. I nodded and grasped her hand carefully so I wouldn't break any of her manicured nails. She was able to pull me to my feet with surprising ease that I wouldn't have expected in someone her size. "My name is Rosaline Landre. If that's too much of a mouthful than you can call me Rose. And we are most defiantly going to have some fun tonight to help you forget your troubles."

"My name is…" I paused as I considered the possibilities. I couldn't very well use my actual name as I'm sure the Order would be looking for me. Spies like Severus Snape make equally good trackers when they have the occasion. "Lavender Brown." A minute brain freeze is the only thing I have to thank for being referred to as Lavender for the rest of my life. But it would work after all the Order would be searching for Hermione Granger not Lavender Brown.

"Well Lavender let's catch a taxi to my hotel before we go out. We could both use a minute to get ready." I know that this is solely for my sake considering her perfect appearance already. I look down at my clothes, old jeans and a plain black t-shirt, perfectly acceptable when going to battle not so much when going to the club.

We went outside of the restaurant and Rosaline was able to quickly able to flag down a cab. "The Hilton, please." Rose told the cabbie as we got in. Once we were moving she turned to me. "So I've noticed the accent. England then?" I nod. "My brother, Dray is from England too. What brings you to New York?"

"I lost two of my best friends in a car accident today. My parents died a couple years back. I don't feel the connection to my home that I once did. I didn't even bring anything with me. I don't know what I'm going to do here. I'm completely lost and usually I have everything planned out. This is a big change for me." It wasn't the whole story or even completely the truth but it was as close as I could come.

"I am sorry for your loss. That must have been very hard." The rest of the cab ride was spent in silence. When we reached the Hilton Hotel Rose paid the cabbie and we got out. Inside the hotel we took the elevator to the top floor. I wasn't really surprised to find out that Rose was staying in the penthouse suite. After seeing the roll of cash she pulled out to pay the cabbie, I knew Rose was either very rich or didn't understand the concept of a bank. Obviously now I realized it was most definitely the former. Her rooms were amazing but the view was the best part. The whole thing was floor to ceiling windows and you were able to see all of New York dazzling beneath us in the night.

Rose went inside her walk in closet. "Lavender?" I followed her inside. She eyed me critically. "I think we are probably about the same size." I gave her a doubtful look which she ignored. She started sorting through the clothes. Finally she found what she was looking for. "Ahh ha! There you are." She pulled out a knee-length green dress and handed it to me.

"Here go put this on; it will look fantastic on you."

I walked out of the closet and realized I didn't know where I was going. Soon enough I found the right room and went inside, locking the door behind me. Knowing that Rose wouldn't mind, I took a quick scolding hot shower to wash away the thin layer of grime on my skin that wouldn't be spelled away. I sampled some Rose's soaps and their sweet scents had me relaxing a tiny bit. After my shower I dried myself off and slipped into the dress Rose lent me. The green reminded me of Harry's eyes but I tried not to think about it.

The dress was very beautiful and really did suit me well. It hugged my curves perfectly. How Rosaline and me fit in the same piece of clothing I will never know. I may be naturally slender but I was nowhere near Rosaline's stick thin size. With a wave of my wand the frizz that was my hair was replaced by soft curls.

Rose was sitting on the edge of a chair, putting on her shoes, when I came out of the bathroom. "I hope you don't mind that I took a quick shower."

"Nope, not a problem." Rose stood up and I suddenly felt very plain. She had on a short sapphire blue dress that showed off her long legs. Her eye make-up was simple, just liner, mascara, and the hint of a shimmer on her lid. Her lips, were obviously supposed to be the focus of her face, they were full and bright red. She had pinned her mass of curls to her head in an elegant up do. Rose wore a chain of sapphires and diamonds around her neck and wrist. Plain black flats completed her outfit. She, unlike me, didn't need heels to create the allusion of height and long legs because those things came to her naturally.

"What no make-up?" She asked as she took in my appearance.

"I don't have any make-up with me. Anyways I never have really been that fantastic at applying make-up so it's not that big of a deal."

Rosaline quickly rose from her seat. "Well if you don't mind I could do your make-up for you. I love doing make-up and I never have anyone to practice on." At my look of hesitation she added, "Come on it will be fun."

"Sure, why not?" She grabbed my hand and pulled into the bathroom. Not only was she good at applying make-up but she was also lightning fast. She was done with my whole face within five minutes.

"There all done!" She turned me around to face the mirror. "Beautiful!" And I had to agree. The real Lavender Brown had tried to do my make-up countless times while we were roommates at Hogwarts to no avail. In the end I had always ended up looking like a clown or a prostitute. Sure for special occasions I would wear light make-up that I applied myself, usually with the help of a spell, but it was nothing like this. I looked beautiful. Plain was not a word that I would use to describe the woman reflected back at me. This woman was on par with Rose. Both women beautiful but in their own right.

I let out the breath that I had been holding in. "Wow! I look amazing." The shock was evident in my voice. "You really can work miracles."

Rosaline laughed, "What can I say, I'm a painter and the face is my canvas. Actually this is what I do for a living. I live in Los Angeles and I work on movie and video sets doing make-up for the actors and actresses. It's my secret talent." She laughed again as if it was an inside joke. She went back into her closet and came back into the room with a pair of heels that were magically my size. They were cute and an antique silver with a butterfly with an emerald body on top. They were easily one of the most elegant pairs of shoes I had ever seen.

"Here's your shoe's." Rose said as she handed them to me. "They will look fantastic with your dress! And look I even have a matching butterfly for your hair." She hurried to the dressing table that was next to her bed and dug through a jewelry box until she came up with that and an old locket. "Here is the butterfly." She showed me it briefly before she pulled one side of my bangs back with it. "And this necklace, I thought would add to your old school charm. Pull up your hair." I did as she asked and watched the small silver heart bobble across my collar bone as she fastened it into place.

"Now put on your shoes so that we can go already." Rose made an impatient show of tapping her feet. I laughed lightly and quickly put my shoes on. When I stood up I found the shoes were actually quite comfortable and sighed in relief. A whole night in pain was not my idea of fun.

"Okay," I smiled looking up at her. "Let's go." We left the hotel and like before a taxi quickly pulled over to pick us up. We got inside and Rose instructed the driver in a low voice.

"We are going to have so much fun tonight Lavender! I'm here on business, actually my last secretary just got married yesterday and I flew here for her wedding. I was one of her bridesmaids and it has been nonstop wedding stuff sense I arrived. But now that the wedding is over and Rachel is off on her honeymoon I have the rest of the day left to enjoy New York before I go home tomorrow. So we have to make tonight count alright?"

"You went through all this trouble for me the least I can do is have fun tonight." I truly hoped that I could live up to my words. I wasn't sure if this would be fun. How could I have fun? My best friends had died less than two hours ago.

I felt the car bump to a stop near the curb and I followed Rose out of the car. There was a line outside at least two blocks long waiting not so patiently to be let inside by the large man that guarded the door. The neon sign above read, _The Blue Duck_ in varying hews of blue. The large man's mean face broke in a toothy grin at our approach.

"Hello ladies, welcome to The Blue Duck. Asses like that should not be wasted standing in a line." He lifted the rope to allow passage. When we got to the door, I looked back to see his eyes watching us walk away appreciatively and smiled. He caught my look and grinned once again.

The club was packed to capacity. We worked our way through the crowd at first but as people took notice to our presence a little path opened in front of us. It seemed that as soon as eyes would set on us they would be fused. People starred unabashed and a small blush crept into my cheeks at the attention.

Finally we made it to the bar and one tap on the shoulder from Rose sent two men scrambling off of their barstools. One of the guys offered to buy us drinks but Rose told him that she could not possibly accept after he had given up his seat for us already.

I would later find out that Rose had a rule with men. She only ever accepted one act of kindness from any man she wasn't interested in. Anymore, she said, caused a man to expect a reciprocal action. Sure she dated men but she tried not to give men that she wasn't interested in the wrong idea.

But men did buy us drinks. One a piece, would be all Rose would allow. The men would talk to us but mostly Rose and I would make jokes amongst ourselves. I found myself getting very drunk quickly. I didn't have Ron or Harry here to tell me to pace myself. I discovered I liked the film that covered my thoughts and the fuzziness of my vision. I loved how the heat of the alcohol enveloped me like a hug from…from someone who I let die. I tried to distract myself from that train of thought but my alcohol infused mind refused to corroperate.

I excused myself from Rose and the group of men that now surrounded us and ran for the bathroom. I barely made it inside before the sobs were ripped from my chest. My legs went to jelly and for the second time that night I found myself alone on a bathroom floor. How could I do this? How could I be out drinking hours after my friends were murdered in front of my eyes.

My sobs had quited into tiny gasps by the time Rose came looking for me. "Oh, Lavender!" Her face alighting in understanding. "This was a horrid idea. I knew you were in a bad state, but I thought this would help get your mind off things."

"It's okay Rose." I hiccuped inbetween my gasps for air. "I just... I just need... I don't know what I need. I'm an emotional mess."

"Well Lavender, let's get you home." At the word home another sob was wrenched from my chest.

"I don't have a home anymore. My aunt lives in town..." I started to lift my self to my feet but the combined affects of the alcohol and the lack of air from my hysterical crying caused my head to swim. I distantly heard Rose call my name as I felt myself begin to fall.

**A/N:**** Hope you liked it. Remeber to review and tell me what you think. Reviews are to my muse what money is to electricity. If the bill doesn't get paid then the electricity will be shut off. lol. **

**Anyways...**

**Thanks for Reading!**

**Patia**


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